Bliss
by Wyvern's Elucidated Brethren
Summary: Songfic to Muse's 'Bliss'. Draco is desperately seeking that what is missing from his life - bliss.


This is a song fic to "Bliss" by the incredibly talented, fantastic band Muse. Warning: does get rather dark, the R rating is just to be safe. Please review and tell me what you think, it's rather different from our other work... the other two don't even know I've written it :)   
Love ya,   
Wyv xxx  
  
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//Everything about you is how I wanna be//  
  
You're lucky, you know, Harry. I know you probably don't feel it a lot of the time, but you are. You're brave, you're a nice person and you're surrounded by friends and people who love you. I wish I had your life, sometimes.   
  
//Your freedom comes naturally//  
  
I wonder what it's like to be free, free like you. I know there's the threat of Voldemort hanging over you constantly, but it's hanging over me too. At least, if the worst comes to the worst, you'll only die. No such bliss for me, but I can't fight my destiny. You're free to choose what you want to be. My life is all mapped out for me and I can't change it. Doomed to live the life of the damned, that's me.  
  
//Everything about you resonates happiness//  
  
I'm so jealous of you, Harry, in your perfect little existence. I watch you sometimes, during lessons and during meal times. You're so happy, and you have every reason to be. Me? I just wish I knew what happiness was.   
  
//Now I won't settle for less//  
  
I want your life, Harry. I want to know what it's like to be free, to experience the bliss that you have. And I know that I can't have that life. I can't be satisfied with my life, not now I've seen what else there can be in life. And if I can't have it, well, there's no telling what I will do... I'm just desperate, desperate to be free.   
  
//Give me   
All the peace and joy in your mind//  
  
I can't handle this any more. I wish I had someone to bring me the peace and happiness that you have. You don't know how hard it is, being the son of one of Voldemort's most highly ranked Death Eaters, living your life in daily torment, fearing for your life, your sanity and your soul. And I want you to give me some of that peace, Harry, the peace that has eluded me all my life. No-one else can, it has to be you, for it was you that highlighted the darkness of my own existence.   
  
//Everything about you pains my envying//  
  
I wish I could sometimes let you see what it's like to be me. And every time I look at you I feel like crying. I'm so jealous of you. Jealous of Mr Perfect Harry Potter. It's like a dull ache inside. The knowledge that I can't be like you, yet I so desperately want to be. I know it's not all bliss in your world, but it's heaven compared to mine. I'm desperate, Harry, so desperate to escape this existence. You have unwillingly shown me a purity in life, and I can't live without it.   
  
//Your soul can't hate anything//  
  
Do you really hate me? You say you hate me, Voldemort, the Dursleys... but is that real hate? The pure, burning hate that runs through my veins? I don't think so. You're too good, Harry. Holiness epitomised in one skinny, scrawny boy. Okay, I know it's not quite like that, but that's what it feels like to me, the eternal outsider.   
  
//Everything about you is so easy to love//  
  
You have so many people who love you, Harry, and it's easy to see why. You're genuine, warm hearted, caring. Your parents died for you, they loved you that much. Hell, even I love you, I can't hate you properly, there's just something about you, some cute, innocent charm. What is it like to be surrounded by so much love? No-one can love me, the cold, contemptuous, bratty, self-centred bastard. My parents? If I was about to fall to my death amid a hungry pack of wolves, they'd be the ones treading on my fingers so I'd lose my grip, especially if there was something to gain from it. Love is something I can't even understand as I've never experienced it.   
  
//They're watching you from above//  
  
You've got quite the charmed life, haven't you Harry? You're protected in ways you don't even know about. Everyone is looking out for you, even your parents. They died to protect you, and that protection is still there within you. I haven't got anyone watching over me, and if I have it's to make sure I don't put a foot wrong. I hate my life and everything about my life. I want your life, Harry, and it hurts me so much that I can't have it.   
  
//Give me  
All the peace and joy in your mind  
I want the peace and joy in your mind  
Give me the peace and joy in your mind//  
  
Can't you see how desperate I am, Harry? I'm always looking for a way out, but there's nothing, nothing to save me. I'm staring into an abyss, black, cold, filled with despair. It's blinding me, suffocating me, and I can't get out. That's why I need you, Harry. You've got to save me from this torment. I can't do anything to save myself, I need a saviour. And that saviour has to be you.  
  
//Everything about you resonates happiness  
Now I won't settle for less//   
  
I'm just asking for bliss, Harry. We're meeting tonight, and I can't wait. I need some of that tranquillity that I can't find here, no matter how hard I look. Even if I have to put you under the Imperius curse to do it, you will give me the release I need. That's how desperate I am.   
  
//Give me   
all the peace and joy in your mind//  
  
We meet at midnight. Nicely melodramatic. And we trade insults, as usual, and we fight, as usual, before stopping to catch our breath.  
  
//I want the peace and joy in your mind//  
  
Then I give you the knife. You stare at me, first in puzzlement, then in horror, as you realise what I want you to do. You offer it back to me, you say you can't do it, but I need you to. You refuse, but I refuse to let you refuse, I'm so close, Harry...   
  
I put you under the Imperius curse. You fight it, but not quick enough....  
  
//Give me the peace and joy in your mind//  
  
You stab me and I slump back. You stare at me, and I see your gorgeous emerald green eyes filling with tears, staring in horror as my life-blood flows from me...  
  
But I'm happy now, Harry. Finally, I'm free, drifting towards darkness and the serenity I have longed for.   
  
Bliss... 


End file.
